Saturday, August 21, 2010

Relationship advice would be nice?

Me man and i were together for 2 years. I did everything for him and i gave him eveyrthing he ever needed ( places to live, clothes, over 10 celll phones, shoes, haircuts, EVERYTHING). He hasd had a hard life and no one has ever stood by him, including his mother until i came around. His dad has never been around and the only father figue that was in his life was a crackhead and is now COMPLETLY out of his life. i realize me and him broke up but we still hang out like we used to..he says im too good for him and i deserve better because he cant do anything for me (materialistically) which i dont care about but now we're not together and hes starting to head down the same direction again...I'm always going to be there for him. i just dont understand how i can do more than anyone has ever done for him and now we're not together. he says he wants to be with me but i dont how i can handle not being apperciated EVEN SLIGHTLY!Relationship advice would be nice?
Any person can reach a point in their lives where they can't see which way is up, and usually someone comes along to be there for them to provide much needed emotional and physical support. This seems like an idlyllic beginning to a lasting bond, but what actually happens more often than not is that a rift forms between these people. Here's why. Most people, no matter how down-trodden they may get, admire the idea of independence and self-determination, and they cling to that last ounce of dignity as it represents all they have (and the only thing left they have to lose). When someone does everything for them (with the best of intentions of being helpful), their living situation improves but their feeling of self-worth diminishes. They do genuinely appreciate what has been done for them, but they cannot escape the feeling that they have been transformed into a ';pet';....and they grow to resent that fact (whether they can articulate this or not). Help is better given in ways that allow the receiver to feel some pride in ownership in their own salvation. This builds their confidence to see themselves actively solving their own challenges, and they go into relationships with those around them on equal footing...standing tall to the best of their abilities. How to put this knowledge into practical use will have to be uniquely tailored to your situation, but doing so is vital. Good luck in this regard.Relationship advice would be nice?
Sounds to me like he wants to do what he wants to do without having to answer to anyone or be responsible to anyone..He loves is freedom and what he does there more than anything you can do or give him.. The freedom he is seeking may not be good for him but it is his life and he will keep right on doing what he wants even after you have been there for him a million times.. Move on slowly and get him out of your life so you can have a life.. Another man is not going to put up with you helping this guy everytime he is down or in trouble and he wont put up with the friendship if he is really into you. I know its hard but this guy is not good for you and you need to move on..
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