Okay so there's this boy and I like him a lot. We started texting and he said he likes me a lot too. He said ';I'm all yours'; and I thought that meant we were together? But today while we were hanging out at the mall, my friend ( who is a guy and one of his friends too) texted the boy I like and askednhim, and he denied it... So I texted him and asked him wtf and he goes '; I never said anything about us being together'; and he goes '; I want to get to know you better before we go out'; so my question is, should I wait for him and me to work out or should I just let him go and move on?Relationship advice?!?!?
Check out PassionsForum.com
It's a site for asking questions about relationships and other people on the site will give you their feedback and you can talk back... I feel like its better coverage than getting random answers on here because you can reply to them and have a full conversation about what your problem is.
Saturday, July 31, 2010
Relationship advice?
Ive been with my bf for 4 yrs. I love him and he loves me.He's 24 and Im 21. He smokes pot on a daily basis. He quits now and then but he always starts up again. I knew he had this problem since we met but it didnt bother me as much because at the time I was in my first sober year myself. I felt like it I was patient I could help him quit. I did much harder drugs and I was able to quit and better myself why cant he? One day he tells me ';I do it all for you, I quit smoking for you.'; and the next thing I know, hes telling me that he doesnt think that his problem affects our relationship so if he gets the urge to smoke, hes gonna smoke. I try to tell him that when he goes through these pot head phases I cant even stand him when hes sober. Its like he doesnt care how I feel about it. Im at my wits end, what do I do? Hes so hard to talk to, he only hears ';youre not perfect enough for me.'; By the way he works 2 jobs %26amp; goes to school so hes not a 'loser.'Relationship advice?
It may be time to take a break from this relationship and do some serious thinking. If he quits just for you ...then starts back...well odds are, that's what he's always going to do. If you can live with that, then so be it but if you don't see yourself married with a couple of kids to a pothead it may be time to move on. Most people who don't grow out of that pothead stage...usually don't have money for a good life because they spend the bulk of their money on smoke. It depends on what kind of future you want.Relationship advice?
What harder drugs did you do?
It may be time to take a break from this relationship and do some serious thinking. If he quits just for you ...then starts back...well odds are, that's what he's always going to do. If you can live with that, then so be it but if you don't see yourself married with a couple of kids to a pothead it may be time to move on. Most people who don't grow out of that pothead stage...usually don't have money for a good life because they spend the bulk of their money on smoke. It depends on what kind of future you want.Relationship advice?
What harder drugs did you do?
Relationship advice.....?
Alright, so I just started college and within about a week and a half of school I met this guy who right away expressed some interest in me and I reciprocated back. Now, he is a verrry nice guy (this I know for sure) so he isn't the player type or anything (hadn't had a gf in about 2 years, also a virgin). So anyways, we had been going out for about 2.5 weeks and for the majority of it he absolutely loved me... wanted me to meet his family, always said how happy he was to have met me, etc.. and then within the last three days or so he started getting the ';friend vibe'; from me (which I kinda did give him so I am to blame) and he started going from always hanging out, flirty, friendly, and fun to being very distant, sending very dry, cold texts and messages and pretty much avoiding me.
Now, instead of talking with me about the friend issue (which would have been a mutual separation) he decided to invite me down to the dorm lounge (after avoiding me for 2 days) and say ';Ok, I just see you as a friend, I'm breaking up with you but hopefully we can still be friends.';
Now, I never really had that “attraction” to him, you know, never felt anything when we kissed despite being attracted to him and really liking him as a person.
Ok, my main question is do you think it is possible that we might have a relationship in the future? Everyone says how compatible we are.. and we both love hanging around eachother.. I just for some reason never felt that “way” towards him.. probably because we rushed things and he started seeing me as a friend as a result. I still want to be good friends with him and I know he wants to be my friend too.. I don’t know how good of friends though.Relationship advice.....?
You're a real bundle of confusion. If I was the guy, I would not want to have a future relationship with you at all. It would only be a friendly acquaintance, if that. Typically, a guy can't stand all of these mixed signals. And if he does, I'll show you a doormat with his name on it.
Sorry for the harshness of tone, but you did ask for an opinion and I gave you one guy's very honest answer on the matter.Relationship advice.....?
Sometimes both sexes will do this whole ';be friends'; talk to try to soften a breakup. It sounds like this is far from necessary in your case because you didn't feel anything in the first place and there wasn't much to break up. So, you can just nod and say, ';cool';, and let him off the hook and it brings a sort of friendly closure so the little fling. This way, if you run into each other at a party some night, neither of you have to feel awkward or worry about drama. That's all that's about. You don't have to pretend or try to be his BFF or anything. Who knows, maybe you'll say ';what's up'; to him one night and he'll introduce you to one of his friends who will turn out to be some kind of amazing person that you'll totally click with.
Now, instead of talking with me about the friend issue (which would have been a mutual separation) he decided to invite me down to the dorm lounge (after avoiding me for 2 days) and say ';Ok, I just see you as a friend, I'm breaking up with you but hopefully we can still be friends.';
Now, I never really had that “attraction” to him, you know, never felt anything when we kissed despite being attracted to him and really liking him as a person.
Ok, my main question is do you think it is possible that we might have a relationship in the future? Everyone says how compatible we are.. and we both love hanging around eachother.. I just for some reason never felt that “way” towards him.. probably because we rushed things and he started seeing me as a friend as a result. I still want to be good friends with him and I know he wants to be my friend too.. I don’t know how good of friends though.Relationship advice.....?
You're a real bundle of confusion. If I was the guy, I would not want to have a future relationship with you at all. It would only be a friendly acquaintance, if that. Typically, a guy can't stand all of these mixed signals. And if he does, I'll show you a doormat with his name on it.
Sorry for the harshness of tone, but you did ask for an opinion and I gave you one guy's very honest answer on the matter.Relationship advice.....?
Sometimes both sexes will do this whole ';be friends'; talk to try to soften a breakup. It sounds like this is far from necessary in your case because you didn't feel anything in the first place and there wasn't much to break up. So, you can just nod and say, ';cool';, and let him off the hook and it brings a sort of friendly closure so the little fling. This way, if you run into each other at a party some night, neither of you have to feel awkward or worry about drama. That's all that's about. You don't have to pretend or try to be his BFF or anything. Who knows, maybe you'll say ';what's up'; to him one night and he'll introduce you to one of his friends who will turn out to be some kind of amazing person that you'll totally click with.
Relationship advice?!?
me and this guy were dating(i'm 17 and he's 22).. well we were on the phone one night and he said he had doubts that we could work out... b/c of the age diff.. he has to work and wouldn't be able to go do things all the time. And it's my senior year and he doesn't want me to miss out on anything. But after this happened he changed his myspace mood to depressed and he told my friend he misses me and's regreting that decision. I really miss him too and just want to be with him... but idk what i should do!.. it's been around 3 weeks and he's still depressed and everything and so am i.Relationship advice?!?
you are not ready for a real relationship. this guy is playing you to get what he wants.. if you know what i mean. all he has to do is make you feel bad and then you would do ';anything'; to make him feel better. let this guy go and find someone that is your same age. better yet.. get thru high school and go to college... you will meet a much better guy that likes you for how smart you are and not what he can get you to do to him.
you are not ready for a real relationship. this guy is playing you to get what he wants.. if you know what i mean. all he has to do is make you feel bad and then you would do ';anything'; to make him feel better. let this guy go and find someone that is your same age. better yet.. get thru high school and go to college... you will meet a much better guy that likes you for how smart you are and not what he can get you to do to him.
Relationship advice- :)?
I have a bit of an issue, I'm seeing a psychologist who doesn't sound very positive about the relationship I have with my live- in partner. We are all the time: I don't know if I want to be in this, that's it we're breaking up/ moving out e.t.c e.t.c. So it is not hard to understand why she gives off this feeling to our relationship. A bit about us- we fight all the time because his family ie mum and grandma are really f^*)ng pissed off that we weren't married and having children after the first 8 months of being together- they're italian, and in my opinion really f*^)ng Stupid!!! Obviously you can see I don't agree with this notion. It has now been 4 1/2 years and he is very attatched to his family so much so that they speak so awfully to me and he feels bad to stand up for me- as some may, (me- no if it were my family) and his mum knowingly knowing this plays on his feelings with manipulation- a lot!!! Long story short I am thinking this relationship is just so f^*)ng hard- do you guys think that it makes sense to separate. He keeps insisting it will get better, he's in therapy trying to help himself deal with issues and then chucks spasms all the time when it comes to them, and I can't f*^)ng stand it!!!! As it is not good for my depression- Thanks :)Relationship advice- :)?
eugh! interfering inlaws! There's nothing worse! Well to be honest if it was me i wouldn't take their **** lying down! If they spoke to me and treated me like that i'd have words and let me tell you they would'nt be very polite ones either! Also, if they are factors causing your depression i really really honestly think you should GET them to listen, it doesn't matter if they brush it off MAKE them listen even if you have to speak the brutal truth. Again talk to your boyf/husband and make him see that what they are doing is hurting you and threaten to leave if he isn't willing to help you. i may sound like a manipulative cow but i'm really not, i'm actually quite nice :D hope this helps! Good luck xxxRelationship advice- :)?
If your partner is close to his family it is better to be positive and be a part of what they have, rather than work against it.
If this isnt something you are prepared to do maybe it reflects how you feel about him and your future together and that should be something you need to have a look at with your pyscologist.
Hope you can find away to sort things out
You need to force hime to make a decision. Either he sorts out his family and their attitude towards you or you leave him because you deserve more than he and his family are offering.
If you and him dont sort out his family then you will carry on arguing about them and no amount of therapy will help. If you are unhappy with the relatinship there is no point in staying together.
theres abook called the five love languages that i read in my relatioship psych class really helped me out talks about relationships with different backgrounds nad peopele of different cultures
if it;''s worth it to you fight if you are just going to get tired mabey it's not
do what makes YOU happy.. if you're not feeling this and would like to move on go for it, just look at the future.. and say, do i want this to be my future? ask yourself some questions.. just be happy
Get a life and stop swearing
U sound as nasty as ur in laws.
italian moms are the boss, they make the rules, even the mafia doesn't mess with mama.
4 1/2 years together? are you planning on marriage and kids? are you waiting for someday? (someday never comes, ever) is he already ';married'; to mama?
things the way they are aren't working. fix it, change it, or end it.maybelline
eugh! interfering inlaws! There's nothing worse! Well to be honest if it was me i wouldn't take their **** lying down! If they spoke to me and treated me like that i'd have words and let me tell you they would'nt be very polite ones either! Also, if they are factors causing your depression i really really honestly think you should GET them to listen, it doesn't matter if they brush it off MAKE them listen even if you have to speak the brutal truth. Again talk to your boyf/husband and make him see that what they are doing is hurting you and threaten to leave if he isn't willing to help you. i may sound like a manipulative cow but i'm really not, i'm actually quite nice :D hope this helps! Good luck xxxRelationship advice- :)?
If your partner is close to his family it is better to be positive and be a part of what they have, rather than work against it.
If this isnt something you are prepared to do maybe it reflects how you feel about him and your future together and that should be something you need to have a look at with your pyscologist.
Hope you can find away to sort things out
You need to force hime to make a decision. Either he sorts out his family and their attitude towards you or you leave him because you deserve more than he and his family are offering.
If you and him dont sort out his family then you will carry on arguing about them and no amount of therapy will help. If you are unhappy with the relatinship there is no point in staying together.
theres abook called the five love languages that i read in my relatioship psych class really helped me out talks about relationships with different backgrounds nad peopele of different cultures
if it;''s worth it to you fight if you are just going to get tired mabey it's not
do what makes YOU happy.. if you're not feeling this and would like to move on go for it, just look at the future.. and say, do i want this to be my future? ask yourself some questions.. just be happy
Get a life and stop swearing
U sound as nasty as ur in laws.
italian moms are the boss, they make the rules, even the mafia doesn't mess with mama.
4 1/2 years together? are you planning on marriage and kids? are you waiting for someday? (someday never comes, ever) is he already ';married'; to mama?
things the way they are aren't working. fix it, change it, or end it.
Relationship advice? long, but please read, it would help me soo much?
ok so here's the deal:
i am 18, and have been kinda hanging out with this guy who is 24 lately. when i go to his house (he rents his own place) all he wants me to do is drink and get drunk. he doesn't say that he wants to get in my pants, but he kinda acts like it. i am a virgin,and i have told him before that i dont want to sleep with him, and he says, 'ok are you sure' and kinda keeps asking me that.
he wants me to hang out with him, watching a movie at his place, and part of me wants to go, but the other part is saying, whats the point? i think i might like him, but he has a track record with sleeping with a lot of girls.
is he playing me, or is he sincere? i dont kow, any thoughts on this would help me out. THANKS!!
Relationship advice? long, but please read, it would help me soo much?
b careful Im a virgin and guys always try to bring alcohol into our plans... So yes proceed with caution. that's my advise he should respect the fact that your a virgin and quit askin stupid *** questions!!!Relationship advice? long, but please read, it would help me soo much?
playing you would be my guess.
He's playing you. The trying to get you drunk part is a dead give away. He keeps saying ';are you sure'; which means he's not really satisfied with your answer, and is hoping you will change your mind. His record of being a whore is a sign of the kind of guy he is and if that's not enough to convince you, I don't know what else is. You want your first time to be special I pressume, and this guy is not going to give that too. Dont do something you will regret.
i think he's trying to have sex with you but he's not going to force you
please answer my question :
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?鈥?/a>
dear just get serious now...he's simply playing around with u...u never know when u could b used just for his cheap sexual desires...he just wants to increase his records of sleeping with girls so b careful n better avoid such people..
Sorry to bust any kind of dream bubbles but what you are describing is a player and hes just winding you up for the punch line and then after hes love you he'll leave you...
Trust me I saw my sister go thur this and after she finally slept with the guy and it was her first time she was nothing to him... and it broke her heart... Its tough to watch, and I'm sure its a crappy way to lose your virginity... wait for a guy that gives you flowers instead of beer.
it sounds like hes just playing you.
say no and get outta there.
i am 18, and have been kinda hanging out with this guy who is 24 lately. when i go to his house (he rents his own place) all he wants me to do is drink and get drunk. he doesn't say that he wants to get in my pants, but he kinda acts like it. i am a virgin,and i have told him before that i dont want to sleep with him, and he says, 'ok are you sure' and kinda keeps asking me that.
he wants me to hang out with him, watching a movie at his place, and part of me wants to go, but the other part is saying, whats the point? i think i might like him, but he has a track record with sleeping with a lot of girls.
is he playing me, or is he sincere? i dont kow, any thoughts on this would help me out. THANKS!!
Relationship advice? long, but please read, it would help me soo much?
b careful Im a virgin and guys always try to bring alcohol into our plans... So yes proceed with caution. that's my advise he should respect the fact that your a virgin and quit askin stupid *** questions!!!Relationship advice? long, but please read, it would help me soo much?
playing you would be my guess.
He's playing you. The trying to get you drunk part is a dead give away. He keeps saying ';are you sure'; which means he's not really satisfied with your answer, and is hoping you will change your mind. His record of being a whore is a sign of the kind of guy he is and if that's not enough to convince you, I don't know what else is. You want your first time to be special I pressume, and this guy is not going to give that too. Dont do something you will regret.
i think he's trying to have sex with you but he's not going to force you
please answer my question :
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?鈥?/a>
dear just get serious now...he's simply playing around with u...u never know when u could b used just for his cheap sexual desires...he just wants to increase his records of sleeping with girls so b careful n better avoid such people..
Sorry to bust any kind of dream bubbles but what you are describing is a player and hes just winding you up for the punch line and then after hes love you he'll leave you...
Trust me I saw my sister go thur this and after she finally slept with the guy and it was her first time she was nothing to him... and it broke her heart... Its tough to watch, and I'm sure its a crappy way to lose your virginity... wait for a guy that gives you flowers instead of beer.
it sounds like hes just playing you.
say no and get outta there.
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Relationship advice..?
ok i know for a fact my fiance and i are inlove. we are engaged but im starting to worry. everytime we fight about something HE does, he turns it around on me and i end up apologizing. i have expressed my concern and he again, turned it around on me.
example:
(he is super jealous)
my brother called, asking to speak to me. my fiance was next to me and would not give me the phone because my brother didn't say who it was exactly. eventually i ended up having to call my brother later..bummer.
so i said to him how i was upset about it and how he needs to trust me, because i mean seriously, how can you marry someone you can't trust? basically he said if i had just told him who it was we wouldn't have had the problem, and that i always talk to other men.
(my best friend is a man and yes, he's gay.)
other than that i don't talk to many male friends..atleast not even close to the amount of women he talks to.
so basically i am always apologizing for something he did wrong, he can never take fault.
how can i actually get through to him?Relationship advice..?
Well maybe you should listen to your man. He told you he is uncomfortable with how you treat other men in your life.....if you keep ignoring him you are just going to make things worse. When he tells you something respect him enough to deal with it. Does not matter if he is right...he deserves more respect than to be ignored cause you feel he is wrong. Chances are you are both wrong and you had both better learn to talk to each otherRelationship advice..?
You are both being picky picky and you dont sound ready for marriage or an adult relationship yet.
If you have these little annoyances in your life and you cant live with them then you are not in love, definitely not, when you are in love there is respect, trust and understanding.
Clearly neither of you have these three things in your life so either split now before the rot sets in or work through these with a counsellor before you even consider marrying.
umm well personally, i wouldn't marry him because the fights would get worse and worse.
and marriage is all about communication. it wouldn't work if he never actually hears what you're saying and understand your point.
This man is finding a way to control you. Beware and do not set a date for a wedding until this gets resolved. In my experience, it is difficult for a controlling man to stop
I was in exactly the same boat as you. My husband used to do the exact same thing until I finally realized that I am letting him do this to me by always being the one to apologize in order to avoid a long dragged out fight. He always had to be right! I decided to stick to my guns and held out the fight until my husband saw my point. At first we had very long fights, some of them ended by me refusing to apologize and telling him that I disagree and that we will have to agree to disagree. Since I wont apologize unless I am wrong, my husband has started admitting when he is in the wrong and apologizing.
you need to tell him that your getting to the point where you've had enough, and tell him that your sick of him turning it around on you all the time, just tell him you need space and make him go somewhere for a week or you go stay somewhere for a week, if he asks why just say you need to think about where this relationship is going to end up if he keeps on this way and that will surely make him poo his pants and straighten up and fly right. see, if you just make out that your really having serious doubts about your relationship it wil probably make him realize more other than if you just tell him, the fear or losing you will be enough to make him pull his finger out. but you really need to go see a relationship physiologist.
example:
(he is super jealous)
my brother called, asking to speak to me. my fiance was next to me and would not give me the phone because my brother didn't say who it was exactly. eventually i ended up having to call my brother later..bummer.
so i said to him how i was upset about it and how he needs to trust me, because i mean seriously, how can you marry someone you can't trust? basically he said if i had just told him who it was we wouldn't have had the problem, and that i always talk to other men.
(my best friend is a man and yes, he's gay.)
other than that i don't talk to many male friends..atleast not even close to the amount of women he talks to.
so basically i am always apologizing for something he did wrong, he can never take fault.
how can i actually get through to him?Relationship advice..?
Well maybe you should listen to your man. He told you he is uncomfortable with how you treat other men in your life.....if you keep ignoring him you are just going to make things worse. When he tells you something respect him enough to deal with it. Does not matter if he is right...he deserves more respect than to be ignored cause you feel he is wrong. Chances are you are both wrong and you had both better learn to talk to each otherRelationship advice..?
You are both being picky picky and you dont sound ready for marriage or an adult relationship yet.
If you have these little annoyances in your life and you cant live with them then you are not in love, definitely not, when you are in love there is respect, trust and understanding.
Clearly neither of you have these three things in your life so either split now before the rot sets in or work through these with a counsellor before you even consider marrying.
umm well personally, i wouldn't marry him because the fights would get worse and worse.
and marriage is all about communication. it wouldn't work if he never actually hears what you're saying and understand your point.
This man is finding a way to control you. Beware and do not set a date for a wedding until this gets resolved. In my experience, it is difficult for a controlling man to stop
I was in exactly the same boat as you. My husband used to do the exact same thing until I finally realized that I am letting him do this to me by always being the one to apologize in order to avoid a long dragged out fight. He always had to be right! I decided to stick to my guns and held out the fight until my husband saw my point. At first we had very long fights, some of them ended by me refusing to apologize and telling him that I disagree and that we will have to agree to disagree. Since I wont apologize unless I am wrong, my husband has started admitting when he is in the wrong and apologizing.
you need to tell him that your getting to the point where you've had enough, and tell him that your sick of him turning it around on you all the time, just tell him you need space and make him go somewhere for a week or you go stay somewhere for a week, if he asks why just say you need to think about where this relationship is going to end up if he keeps on this way and that will surely make him poo his pants and straighten up and fly right. see, if you just make out that your really having serious doubts about your relationship it wil probably make him realize more other than if you just tell him, the fear or losing you will be enough to make him pull his finger out. but you really need to go see a relationship physiologist.
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