Relationship Advice Needed.?

Ok here is my situation. I have been with Jen for a little over 4 years now and engaged for two. She just told me last night that we need to break up. The reason for the breakup is me. I am a smoker and she WILL NOT be with a smoker. She has told me this from day 1 and I was completely aware of how she felt. I told her that I would quit. I did fairly well the first time I quit but failed and started to smoke again. She then found an ashtray in my apartment and was going to break up with me this was about a year an a half into the relationship. She gave me another chance. I did quit however started smoking once again. I was then caught again on 2 more occasions with I gave her my word that it was the last time. Well it wasn't I started again. Let me say that I tried SO hard and somehow always failed. As you can guess she has noticed that I have been smoking again lately and as left me this time. She says that she can't trust me, has lost respect for me, and is no longer attracted to me. Here is the problem I Love this woman more that anything in the world and would do anything for her. I KNOW that i will never smoke again. This has been a life altering experience for me. I want this woman in my life so bad. I WILL NOT let myself go back. She however does not believe me and I honestly cannot blame her. She has agreed to maybe try and work things out. We are going to see each other on mondays for dinner and go to a counseler in 3 weeks. We are supose to go to hawaii on the 26th of September for her birthday so it gives us a month. Does anybody have any advice for me? Did I really blow it? Can this relationship be saved? She does say that she still loves me. Any advice will be appreceated.Relationship Advice Needed.?
sounds like your smoking might just be her out


shes not attracted to you,cant trust you,and has no respect for you


why b/c your addicted to something hard to quit?


she should be supportive in your efforts and less criticalRelationship Advice Needed.?
Well if you really love her you will STOP even tough is hard for you but I think you should demonstrate her that your honest this time and that you will stop smoking just go to some classes.
http://myspace.com/amazingadvicegiver


trust me i get all my answers from her, she's never turned me down!
Go to your doctor and tell them you need to quit.. they will help you with that.
Well just think about it. If she really loved you would she really care if you smoked or not? If I was her I really wouldn't care but then maybe there is a story behind this all, maybe she has lost someone because of this habit. I smoke as well and I know how hard it is to give so I know exactly how you feel, specially when your friend smoke and you're on a night out. Maybe the reason why she doesn't want you to smoke is because she doesn't want you dead in a few years time as you are engaged and as she must love you she doesn't wanna lose you and I kind of know what she feels like. But if you really want this girl to be yours then regain her trust, really make her believe that you won't do it again.
If she's breaking up with yo cause you smoke, then you need to re-evaluate your relationship hardcore. There are things that are going to come up in the future that are going to make this ';smoking'; episode pale in comparison and if she can't handle that, you are in some deep doo doo. You sound more like you are obsessed and that she's manipulative. YES smoking is bad, but she obviously knew you smoked and that you would have a problem with it. Someone who truly loves you will help you, not threaten you. She sounds like a manipulative, potentially abusive ***** to me. However, if you love that, who can say its wrong? But, you need to love yourself first, which it does not sound like you do. Good Luck.
Dude, there is no other way but to stick to your word. If you say that you're going to quit smoking, then quit smoking. That's the only way you'll get your lady-love back.





If you really find it hard quitting smoking, then I suggest you seek medical help. Go to your doctor and tell him your problem about smoking. I'm sure your doctor will give you something --- maybe a nicotine patch, or some tablets or whatever.





It's not enough that you KNOW that you won't smoke again. You have to make an effort --- maybe an extraordinary one --- to keep true to your word.





You can still save the relationship. She still loves you and that's a very bright spot, man. Go get her again and go get her for good!





Good luck! :-)
This is retarded. I was a smoker and my relationship was never in danger because of it. I took those Chantix pills, and then after two weeks I guess they are saying you could go blind, skin scarring, ect. So I quit taking them and don't have the desire to smoke, but even if I started back up my bf would still love me for it. I think she is over reacting. You smoked when she met you right? then what's the big deal. You quit when you are ready.